I'm jealous of your bromance
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
So vagazzling was a success