Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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