Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
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