Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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