i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
