doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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