Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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