I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
