guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
