New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
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i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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