I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize