idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
