Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
