with your own penis?
I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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