U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
