Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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