He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
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Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
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BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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