i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
