there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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