she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Shame - the story of my life.
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