I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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