I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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