just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
