You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
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