Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
