I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Randomize