Your tits are I can't wait for
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize