How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
