i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
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