He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
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