i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Randomize
