Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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