she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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