Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize