what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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