would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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