meet me or not, i'm out of control
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
