her vagine was all disorganized.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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