Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
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