What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
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