it's too hot outside to masturbate.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
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