At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
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