You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
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I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
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