White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
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