So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
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My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
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So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
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