I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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