Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
