Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Randomize