Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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