Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(210): View more from Texas

Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?

(1-210): View more from Texas

I'll teach you how to wipe better

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe

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(512): View more from Texas

boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.

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(806): View more from Texas

pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?

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(479): View more from Arkansas

This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.

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(503): View more from Oregon

The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck

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(903): View more from Texas

This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.

(254): View more from Texas

Jealous?

(903): View more from Texas

Very.

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(510): View more from California

Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment

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(707): View more from California

Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.

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