I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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