you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Randomize